Sunday - Thinking about Friendship

Well we have had the most social of weekends - dinner with friends both Friday and Saturday night, both filled with lots of laughter and good discussion and silly stuff.  I always consider myself lucky to have all of the friends that I have in life and find that they become increasingly important as I age.  I think when our children are young we are so busy and we struggle to see as much of our friends as we would like.    Now, as my children are transitioning out of the house, we are suddenly able to be much more social and it is a lot of fun.

Like you, we have disparate groups of friends, although there is a core group of people that we see the most and who know us best.  They are the people that have seen you dancing badly to disco or "accidentally" slipping out of your chair...And they still invite you back.... 

you'd be surprised to learn that not everyone wants this at their party....

It is odd when the various groups overlap at "events", but it can be fun, too.

However, what I love is that you make friends throughout your life.  One of my old work buddies recently retired and I hope to be able to spend more time with her and her husband as they are so much fun.  I have also made some new friends in the last couple of years who have become very dear to me. 

One thing I am increasingly conscious of is the need to be absolutely authentic in my friendships.  I love all of my friends and I find them all infinitely fascinating and kind.  They have been a real source of strength for me over the years, especially during the last year when my father was dying and I decided to leave my job to pursue my dream of being a writer. 

I used to be sometimes shy to show "all" of me.  I don't know why that is, and I think that people who know me here and in the flesh (God - what is a better term to differentiate blog friends from local friends?) would be surprised by that, but it is true. 

I am goofy and smart and sentimental and I can be kind of odd.  I was always embarrassed to tell people that I didn't love my job because it was a good job and I felt it made me seem ungrateful.  I was always embarrassed to tell people I wanted to be a writer because it sounded both airy-fairy and kind of pretentious to me.  But that was my problem, never theirs, as I have not received anything but love and support from my friends. 

Plus, you know what?  Here is the truth - only you are that invested in your life (maybe your spouse is - though even then, I don't think Barry is wondering how to hide my muffin top).  Most people just want their friends to be happy.  I know that's all I want.  I don't care how they make a living, I don't care what they dress like, I don't care about their house or their car or anything except inasmuch as whatever they surround themselves by and immerse themselves in makes them Happy.  So why I would imagine that others would care about my choices is beyond me.  My own insecurities, I guess.

It took my a while to tell my friends about this blog, because I felt quite shy about telling people that I natter on and on about life, my perspective (or lack thereof!) on everything, and am not expecting anything from this venture except the opportunity to get it all out and find more like-minded individuals.  When I started this blog, it was to unlock the creative part of myself again.  But somewhere along the way, I realized it was really about finding new friends and forms of communications.  What a wonderful gift, and so unexpected!



what a really good friend provides you with....

I think it is critically important to one's mental health to have friends with whom we can be truly and freely ourselves.  I don't think there is a formula for making friends, but if there is it must be composed in part of being able to give of yourself.  Your time, your skills, your perspective, and ideally, you feed them.  I love it when my friends feed me.  I love to feed my friends.  There is something so joyful about all sitting around a table and talking and eating and passing the wine!

So on this fine Sunday, I raise my glass to friendship in all of its guises.  Thank god we continue to find our Tribe throughout this life - each new friend is like a gift, our old friends are our heirlooms, and I look forward to finding the gems who are out there looking for me.  Cheers!!!!

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Carpet update!

I can say that the spot cleaner was okay, but what turned the tide was the white wine, club soda method!  Thanks Louise and thanks to the rest of you - I definitely need some Oxyclean in my arsenal.  The only sad moment was using Sauvignon Blanc to douse the red wine...



Indy at the scene of the crime - biggest stain is to left as you walk in the door

Not bad, huh?  Smells a bit like there was a party in there and I guess there was.....


It is going to be a hot day today.  Am hoping to go for an early walk and then read out by the pool.  Hard life.  I hope you all have a wonderful day - stay safe out there!