A Tea Party to Help Drive Away Winter and Talk Style

Under certain circumstances there are few hours in life more agreeable than the hour dedicated to the ceremony known as afternoon tea.

Henry James 

The Weather outside was frightful, 

But luckily, I had planned something quite delightful: A Style Statement Tea Party!

While I was making a lavender blueberry tea loaf and buttermilk and blackberry scones, I sent Barry out with one mission: find me yellow and pink tulips!  If Spring refuses to come to the Maritimes, we will just have to force it, like one would force a paper white or amaryllis bulb in time for Christmas...

As a Wendy aside, even as I am looking at the delightful tea table below, I am thinking of how wonderful it would be if the walls were pink or a pale blue.... hmm.. remember that pink post?  Can't you just see it?

Well anyway, four girlfriends came over to spend the afternoon with me for our inaugural tea time soiree.  We missed our friend Colleen, who was gummed up with life stuff, and were all dying to meet Mary's sister-in-law, Cathy, who unfortunately had to cancel.  Next time Cathy!

I set the table with all kind of tea table frippery:

 

The tea loaf:

You know, I haven't made a tea loaf in a long time, and think I will do so again really soon!

Some of the teacups my mother used to set out for her bridge and IODE meetings in the 60s, 70s and 80s:

I didn't use a fancy tablecloth on the table, since we were going to be doing a "craft" after we ate and talked...

A close-up of our Queen:

 

 

and of course the MacLeod teacup had to come out (even if my family spells it McLeod...)

 

 

 

I personally adore a teacup where the pattern is inside the cup as well, don't you?

 

Scones served on Wedgewood, anyone?  Thanks Mom for choosing lovely china when you got married...

Teapots a-ready, since Chez Wendy offers a variety of teas, though for this party, King Cole Tea and Christmas in Paris seemed the crowd favourites:

The centerpiece was my homage to spring, little vases of tulips, my diptyque candle, a silvery Eiffel tower and wee teacups:

And doll's china under a couple of the vases on the table:

In the beginning, we sat around and chatted about life, including next weekend's dinner party at Mary's house, which in honour of the Spring Solstice will involve outdoor activities and the burning of sock and which I hope she will post about in her wonderful blog!

And we discussed a possible group road trip to check out the soon-to-be-reopened Algonquin Resort in St. Andrews.  We may have discussed husbands, but what is said at the tea party, stays at the tea party...

Then we discussed our style statements, and helped a couple of folks who were still struggling with finding their second word.  Lots of good discussion and debate and it was quite interesting, as we have all know one another for a long time so we could perhaps be more objective than the person themselves. 

Thanks to a brainwave by Mary in advance, we did collages of our words, which was fun and not something you usually sit around and do with your friends!  There is something satisfying about cutting and pasting and using stickers.  I am convinced that everyone should be doing this kind of thing more often, as it really is quite fun!


I had my trusty scissors, box o'markers, stickers, some Bristol board at the ready, and Mary and I had collected magazines to be hacked up:

And then we got to work:

Martine - Classic-Elemental - on the left, already trying to figure out where closest Williams-Sonoma is and has just discovered Town and Country magazine, which I think I will get her a subscription to for her birthday

Dawn - our classic-timeless, who always look perfect, and Elaine our Earthy-Rustic!

Elaine had no trouble with her words - have never met anyone who knew themselves better than Elaine - old soul!

Mary - AKA judy dench - who is genuine innovative!

Mart doesn't have her eyes closed for this picture - she is dreaming of copper pots from Williams-Sonoma....

When everyone was done we brushed them with clear Elmer's glue to have them set and then dried them with a hairdryer.


And voila, each one different, each one special!

Wendy's (creative-nostalgic)

elaine's

Mary's

Martine's - she and I both had champagne on ours - that's why we love each other!

Dawn's - it is clear Martine and Dawn love blue!

My husband, hidden away in the basement, said he couldn't get over all the talking, talking, talking and all the laughter.  Sometimes it is just a wonderful thing to sit around and talk and giggle and discuss things we might not otherwise talk about. 

I think I like this tea party concept.  I could see doing this again in the summer or fall, but maybe having a different topic or activity.  Kind of a salon thing...  Maybe we could solve the world's problems next time (though we did discuss where that missing airplane is...)  Maybe next time there will be champagne at the end and the husbands can join us afterwards for takeout pizza... hmmm - I am seeing a plan here... what do you think, ladies?

So thank you to all of my wonderful friends for an amazing afternoon of conversation and camaraderie!  See you for the sock burning next weekend!

 Hope you enjoyed sharing the afternoon with us!  Stay safe out there!

When you have nobody you can make a cup of tea for, when nobody needs you, that's when I think life is over.

Audrey Hepburn

 

 

Style Wednesday - what I REALLY wore this summer....

Well today is August 21st.  Our favourite retailers, via the web and big thick glossy magazines, are wooing us with their wares, tantalizing us with their stylings, their colours, their vision for us.

And you KNOW I am not immune to the siren calls of the fashionistas, who loll upon the rocks in their burgundy lips (which is apparently the NEW! look every fall..), camel coats (INVESTMENT SHOPPING!) and IT bags.  If Summer is bohemia, Fall is Christian Dior New Look.

You just KNOW that this, or a variation thereof, is the sartorial catnip of our Septembers:

Virevolte suit, Christian Dior, Autumn/Winter 1955

Source 

Put it with booties and patterned tights, and away you go!

But I cannot move to Fall yet.  I am not yet done with Summer.  Not because of the fine weather that still is with us.  No - I am not done with Summer yet as there are lessons still to be learned from the Wendy Summer 2013 collection. 

I remember the heady early planning days, when I imagined how I would wile away my summer, resplendent in so many delights....

Remember this red Lauren shift?  I wore it twice so far.  It seems that I forgot that I was no longer working and would therefore not search out a shift dress regularly...

How about the black linen dress? 

Wore it once.  Ditto the reason...

Bought this blazer from J Crew - wore it twice:

Mint sequin cami?  Once

Now some of this you could blame on my current state of transition.  You would be right.  Some of this could be blamed on an overly-optimistic image of drinking in trendy clubs or dining in fine restaurants.  You would be right.  Some of it could be blamed on a rainy summer.  Yup, that, too.

But the reality is that I am still a work in progress in defining my stay-at-home style.  I still have an extra 15 lbs on my body, and I refuse to feel uncomfortable in anything.

So what did I wear this summer?

Well, I wore this little Theory jersey dress quite a bit, along with the Michael Kors black Tstrap sandals:

A Navy J Crew tshirt and a Gap linen skirt recommended by Ema.

And the following two piles of clothes:

1) pink/white pile:

And Navy/Blue/Black pile:

All in all, it turns out I wore about 30 articles of clothing in June, July, and August...

I was captivated by light pinky or white/creamy hues, which I only spiked with my Nougat London dress in the watermelon shade.  The light nectar J Crew lightweight cashmere cardigan was worn constantly.

 

As was the little top of unknown origins with its sweet birds that reminded me of a happy painting...

 

 My nougat London top, white J Crew linen skirt, ivory café capris, pink glittery sweatshirt..

A little cotton H&M top..

 The Blues were pale as well - my pale blue blazer, my jeans, my nougat London boho top, my floral A line cotton skirt...

 

Blue sweaters, silk top...

Black café capris, gap silver maxi skirt, grey and black jersey skirts and tops from Fig and Horny Toad...

Oh sure, some others things were worn - like tees and tanks.  The VERY odd pair of pants, my Anthro moto cardigan.

But really, if you happened upon me at all this summer, this is what you would have seen me in. 

30 items (plus work out duds and the odd jackets and of course loads of little shoes and necklaces and earrings...). 

I looked at the rest of the things in there and divided them into reasons they were never worn:

1) too dressy/corporate
2) didn't feel like "me" anymore
3) slightly tight - I refused to wear anything that didn't fit perfectly
4) didn't have any "occasions".

Then I looked again at what I did wear against the recently completed Style Statement that I mentioned last week, and picked out a couple of key points that I thought related best to clothing:

Creative:

They live to express themselves in their own way.

Nostalgic:

They put creative thought into their home and appearance and love trying their treasures and good finds together with contemporary basics.  Attracted to the whimsical and the precious, Nostalgic had a great eye and hear for detail and seeks to fill life with the small pleasures that matter most.
And while everything shown above may not EXACTLY fit into those descriptions, they are certainly REMINSCENT of them. 

 

 So now, I believe I have a sense of what worked and what my mistakes were this summer.  Many things I got rid of along the way - some things I will put away at the end of the summer and see what next year brings.  Some of the dressy or fun things will have their place in the sun at some point no doubt, and a black linen dress is always a lovely thing for the inevitable sombre summer event.  But in the end, I still basically only wore 30 items. 

So in addition to the colour story that we discussed yesterday, my fall purchases, and decisions as to what to keep or not keep of what I already have will be based on:

1) does it fit?
2) is it comfortable
3) is it flattering?
4) do I love it?
5) am I actually going to wear it or have I just seen someone I like wear it or a jcrew/anthro/whatever label model wear it and think I need it to?
6) does it fit with my style statement - which in the end should be linked to #4....


Sorry to be long-winded!  Hope this little exercise has helped someone else as well as they think about fall.

In the end, we must style ourselves. This review has helped me realize what my new style is.

Tomorrow is J Crew's September roll-out, and I am sure I am going to have something to say about that....

 Have a great Wednesday and stay safe out there!!!


 

Thursday: Style Statement

I blame my sloth of late on Blue Booby.

A couple of weeks ago, she recommended the book STYLE STATEMENT, I looked at my local bookshop's website and saw that there were a couple of copies in stock, and I ran over and purchased one and bought it home.

And for the last two weeks, have been almost completely immersed in it.

 

 

It isn't so much a book, as a workbook, filled with a myriad of questionnaires to measure all aspects of your likes and dislikes, what makes your heart sing, what fills your soul, what depletes your soul (kind of like the anti-style muses folks referred to yesterday).

It is about style, but the style in the book is NOT simply fashion style per se, it is about such things as:

• how you like to do things
• where you feel most at home
• what do you love about yourself
• what are you fascinated by
• what is your philosophy of friendship
• how you express your mental and physical creativity

etc, etc, etc.

There are MANY questionnaires and exercises throughout the book, all of which are designed to help you create your own style statement, your own personal branding if you will.

I have done Myers-Briggs and other personality quizzes in the workplace - they help you define your comfort zones and your natural tendencies, but they do not help you zoom in on the intrinsic you, nor do they help you zero in on your personal life, from soup to nuts.

Working on your style statement does that.

It is not something you do in one or two or even three sittings.  It probably took me about 10 hours of work to fully explore and answer the questions fully and honestly.

It was FUN.  And sometimes uncomfortable. And always illuminating.

In the end, through the exercises, you are able to narrow yourself down to a statement that is summed up in two words, one of which is 80% foundation - what the authors define as the core of who you are, your essential self, your BEING and the other of which is 20% creativity edge - that thing that makes all the difference, that moves you forward - how you EXPRESS and DISTINGUISH your being.

When I got to the end (though to be truthful, I still have work to do - there are more exercises to complete when you are actually done your style statement), I had a "HOLY F*&^$! MOLY!"  moment - I knew that the two words, and the descriptions behind them, were a true distillation of me and I also wished that I had done this exercise a long time ago, as the disconnect that I felt with my old work life makes absolute perfect sense to me now having really examined all aspects of myself.  For those of you who loathe introspection and navel-gazing, this is likely not for you, but even for the hardest core cynical, rational individual, there is much to be gained by doing this..  I ran out and bought a copy for my daughter, since 21 is probably not a bad time to get a sense of your temperament.  While the authors explain that some parts of ourselves evolve and change over time, our true selves are relatively constant and I am quite sure if I had done this at 21 my results would have been pretty much the same.  I also conferred with Barry after the fact for confirmation and he said it was scarily bang on.

It appears it is out of regular stock at Chapters bookstore, but some of the Chapters do have it in their bargain sections, which I am sure they would order in for you if you are interested and Amazon.com (link above) had a lot of new and used ones that can be ordered - just make sure yours isn't already scribbled in!)

So, what did I turn out to be?

CREATIVE (80%) - NOSTALGIC(20%)

My descriptions are as follows:

Creative:

Creative is a life-affirming explorer.  Gifted with fantastic imaginations, Creative will
 seek out originality - unique people and experiences, abstract thinking, and fantastical, whimsical notions.  Small-mindedness and regulations deeply pains Creative.  Resourceful, determined, and passionate, they can find a way through any circumstance.  Naturally flexible and positively capable of reinventing themselves and turning situations around, they tend to be comfortable with change.  Fully expressed, Creative a powerful force that can inspire people to change for the better and shift directions.  They are highly sensitive to their surroundings and, for better or worse, can be sponges for emotions and information.  They feel most useful when they are being inspired or are inspiring others.  They live to express themselves in their own way.  On a dark day, they feel disconnected from their source of inspiration - whether it be material or immaterial, earthly or divine - adrift or on the "outside" of things.  In the best of times, Creative feels a deep sense of harmony and synchronicity with positive forces that keep life moving forward.  Creative endeavours to respect others' forms of expression and can be very tolerant.

Look & Feel: Original, unique, one-of-a-kind.  Crafted, innovative, colourful, abstract, thought-out, free-flowing, artistic.  Creative always puts things together in their own way.

aesthetic, artistic, clever, cool, crafty, cultivated, cultured, dramatic, elegant, exquisite, fertile, formative, gifted, graceful, grand, harmonious, hip, ideal, imaginative, ingenious, innovative, inspired, inventive, musical, original, ornamental, pictorial, picturesque, pleasing, poetic, productive, prolific, refined, rhythmical, satisfying, sensitive, skillful, stimulating, stylish, sublime, talented, tasteful, visionary.


Nostalgic:

Nostalgic is an ambassador of sentiment.  They collect memories, trinkets, rare and precious things, and memorabilia.  Nostalgic loves to pay homage to what has come before.  Enamoured by the past - from royalty to rock stars, family heirlooms to classic films - they work it into the present with charm, quirkiness and often elegance.  They are usually hopeful romantics, yearning and working toward creating fulfilling connections.  Their social circle is very important to them, as are the basic social graves of politeness and a welcoming heart.  Nostalgic likes to look good.  They put creative thought into their home and appearance and love trying their treasures and good finds together with contemporary basics.  Their bittersweet yearning for the past or fanaticized future can lead to melancholy, the cure for which is resolute trust and practical planning.  Attracted to the whimsical and the precious, Nostalgic had a great eye and hear for detail and seeks to fill life with the small pleasures that matter most.

Look & Feel: Vintage, antiques, rarities, collectible. Gentility, sweetness, poise.  Romantic, dreamy, cinematic, glamorous.

ancestry, culture, customs, enchanting, estate, fairy tale, fashion, fondness, heirloom, history, idealistic, imaginary, inheritance, legacy, mysterious, mythological, novel, passionate, picturesque, poetic, remembering, ritual, sentimental, tradition, wisdom.

If you could see the office I am currently making for myself (and you soon will) you will be gob-smacked by how my style is represented there.

Even learning this has helped me understand what the disconnects are in my wardrobe - there always needs to be a spin in what I wear and more than that, there always needs to be something that reflects my past or my family's past or has a vintage vibe.  I think that is why brands like Nougat London and Anthropologie and Brora  and Tory Burch are appealing to me for fashion or for the home.  And why I would much rather go to the local junk shop than ever have anything modern in my house.

But that is just ME.  Everyone of us is different and those differences are fascinating and make the world so interesting and if we are all kind to one another about those differences, can be a source of great celebration and learning!  For example, you won't find modern in my house, but I LOVE to go to a modern hotel or to someone's modern house and marvel at the décor!

The interesting thing about the book is that once you have defined your style statement there is still work to be done.  The authors help you work with it, envision it, listen to it, "let it seep into your bones" and as they say "your style statement will be as useful as you make it."

They invite us to "Go Forth and Live as Art!"

I also suspect, having recently lived through this myself, that if you are not living in accordance with the true you, your real essence, you might be destined to live a life that is often fraught with unhappiness and a feeling of being unfulfilled or of not being the sort of person who had a dream or an un-actualized  essence.  You might be frustrated and jealous of the perception that others know who they are and are pursuing it, or are just more content in life than you are.  But I believe you would be wrong. 

As soon as I named myself, recognized myself and celebrated myself (really, I ought to have bought champagne when I finished on the weekend - where are those baby bottles when you need them! Oh wait - I drank them..), I felt that there was a world of possibilities.  Obviously, I was already stumbling in this direction quite resolutely, but this book had been a god send.
  
Your foundation and creative edge words will be different than mine (or in some cases not), but your responses to the questions asked will be as different as if we were living on different planets - our lives and experiences and temperaments all lead us on different journeys. 

My style statement allows me to name and celebrate what makes me tick and will, I hope, help me choose more wisely in the future when I got to make purchases or write or decorate or try to decide if silver eyeliner is appropriate in the day time (it is for me!).

My closest friends would have recognized me in the descriptions above, though they might not have known what to call it.  I certainly wanted you to know me as well.  You are so kind as to drop by almost daily - I guess you need to be warned that we will be having these discussions from time to time, me being so sentimental and poetic and all ;-)

Have a lovely Thursday and stay safe out there!